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couldeatthatgirlforlunch · 2 months ago

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For the yandere! Justice League x assistant reader, how would they react if they had Deadpool as a friend? Like he randomly shows up. They would try to keep the reader as far away from him as possible, but it's Deadpool. Lol. How would Yandere Justice League feel if the reader liked Deadpool because he's funny and makes the reader laugh even if in a tense situation, randomly just talking about nonsense and/or making funny jabs at some of Justice League members? Not only that, but he would just annoy them for his and the reader's amusement. I can also imagine Wonder Woman or Superman trying to kill/critically injure him but finding out he has a super healing ability. LOL. I can imagine the scene where Deadpool punches Colossus, but his hand breaks, then he tries again while saying, "Cock shot!" but his other hand breaks. Instead, he does it to Superman and says, "Oh, your poor Lois Lane!" I feel like that would make the reader laugh out loud.

I finally saw the Deadpool & Wolverine movie, and I loved it! So now I want to see more content about Deadpool. I forget how funny he can be. I would like you to add a Deadpool & Wolverine, but I don't know if you have seen the movie yet. But I recommend you go and watch the movie.

A Day in Life: Best Friends Forever

Synopsis: A day in your life where a visit from your friend ends up in Deadpool losing his thumbs and re-attaching them back.

Pairing: Yandere!Justice League X Gn!Assistant!Reader; Platonic!Deadpool

Tw: 18+; No spoilers from the movie; Some violence; Light gore descriptions (not really); Some sexual comments (it's Deadpool); English is my 2nd language.

Word count: 830

Requested? Yes.

Extra notes: I loved this request, saw the movie on like the same week it came out, sorry this took so long</3

General masterlist | A Day in Life - Series masterlist

— So that's what happens when I’m not around, huh?! — Hal Jordan snarked, faking amusement by the sight in front of him, but being very much not amused.

How? Was the question going through everyone's minds, as they watched their dear assistant (Y/N), in the middle of Hall of Justice, chatting away with a very infamous criminal known all around the hero-villain underground, who every single soul despised, and yet, there you were, choking your laughter and in tears with Deadpool, acting as if you've been friends all your life.

Diana was the first one to approach, followed by the rest of the Justice League.

— (Y/N), is this man bothering you? — She squared up and stared directly on Deadpool’s blank white lenses. That grounded you and helped you come back from the stories your friend was telling you.

— B-Bothering me? — Your laughter slowly died down, and you wiped your tears. — No, we’re just talking. — You shrugged and sniffled, so happy that a genuine smiled was fixed on your face, hypnotizing all the heroes for a moment.

— Wonder Woman! — Deadpool gave little fangirl jumps. Diana swallowed a groan. — It’s amazing to see you again! I’m even wearing my fanciest anal plug and thinking about you, all in your honor. — Diana couldn't control the disgusted and astounded expression on her face, while Wade saluted her. You bite your lips to not giggle.

— Don't be silly, Pool. Not everyone understands your humor. — You lightly slapped his shoulder and he sighed.

— I know! That's why I'm so introverted and depressed! — He shook his head. — That's why Disney sold me to DC, they couldn't handle my deep and complex character. Let's hope James Gunn knows what he's doing now. — Everyone, including you, furrowed their eyebrows, but no one decided to question what the hell he was talking about, since the mercenary was known for being insane. — And just after my third movie with Wolvie came out! Unbelievable. — He threw his hands in the air and shook his head while looking at an empty space as if there was someone there. He did that sometimes.

— You seem… Close. W-When did that happen, (N/N)? — Flash looked between you and Deadpool, biting his lower lip, slightly anxious. You blinked.

— Oh, well. Like, a few months ago? He sent his curriculum because he wanted to be part of the Justice League. There were no records of him in the system so I Interviewed him. Obviously he didn't pass, but we became good friends! — You shrugged with an easy smile.

— That's… Great, (N/N). — You narrowed your eyes on Hal Jordan.

— Hey… — Deadpool's mask gave the slightest hint that he was furrowing his eyebrows, and he pointed at Green Lantern. — (Y/N) told me about you. I don't like you. — He took his guns out of the holsters and pointed at the brunette. You gasped and stepped back, slightly regretting having told Wade about that. — STEP BACK WORST RYAN REYNOLDS SUPERHERO MOVIE OR I’M GONNA BLOW YOUR BRAINS OUT IN 4K R-RATED! — Hal raised his arms. He was already on thin ice with you, and beating your bestie would probably be a bad idea to start over.

Batman grunted for someone to cover your eyes and threw two batarangs that disarmed Deadpool before he could react. Deadpool gasped and looked at the ground wide eyed. His thumbs had been chumped off in the ordeal (Batman was jealous and also knew he would just regenerate).

— WHAT? WHAT’S HAPPENING? — You blindly yelled, since Superman had zoomed to just behind you and was covering your eyes.

— HE CASTRATED ME! — Deadpool cried, reaching back for his swords, but since he didn't have thumbs anymore, he couldn't even hold them, making him just cry more from frustration. — THE DADDY ISSUES JUST GET WORSE! AND JUST BECAUSE I WAS READY TO BE ADOPTED BY YOU! — Batman furrowed his eyebrows at the mention of him having more than just one kid.

— Guys, we should all just calm down. — Flash tried to play the pacifist, standing in the middle of the chaos with his hands up, but Wade’s cries were covering his voice.

— WHAT'S HAPPENING? — You tried to tug Superman’s hands off, but he didn't let up, and started trying to sooth you.

Deadpool got to his knees and pathetically tried to push one of his thumbs into place, trying to accelerate his healing process, and after 30 seconds of chaos, he perked up when the thumb got attached again. He did the same to the other one.

— The sight is gross, (Y/N). You do not want to see it… — Wonder Woman mumbled, eyes fixed on the scene, feeling a mix of grossed out and impressed.

— Gross? This is natural. Like the birth of a little naked newborn baby. You wanna know what's real gross? My roommate Blind Al’s stink! She might as well be dead at this point… Uh, oh… — Wade slowly got up. — (Y/N)... Call me an Uber. I need to check on someone.

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eddiernunson · 1 year ago

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Nice to Meet You, Where You Been? | Eddie Munson x f!Reader | 18+

Thank you to @forget-you-morelike-fuck-you for editing, you're the best!

Summary: your college roommate takes you to the annual Harrington Halloween Party, where you expect to do nothing but get drunk and dance for a night. That was...until you turn around to the person dancing against you to Eddie fucking Munson.

Warnings: strangers to lovers, praise/degradation, hook-up at a party, daddy kink, creampie, no protection, slow ish build up, size kink? maybe?, hooking up under the influence

I had a whole ass plan to write for KinkTober but executive dysfunction took over. Hopefully this makes up for it...maybe.

I have another Halloween themed fic from last year, EddiexReader with Steve if anyone is interested

Word Count: 6.1k

You sit in the backseat of your roommate’s boyfriend’s beater, the music bumping through the stereo as you make your way to what is supposedly the biggest Halloween party of every year. Your roommate spent the beginning of your fall semester hyping up this party as the best place to be on a Halloween night. Her insistence was charming, and you were looking for an excuse to get drunk. So, now you are watching as you pass by Halloween decorations and children dressed in costumes going Trick-or-Treating.

You don't pay much attention to what they're saying, the gist of it reminiscing on the Halloween parties they had attended in the past. Your roommate had made it very clear from the start that this guy, whatever his name was, his Halloween parties were legendary in town. He has only been throwing them for a handful of years, but if you were a young adult in rural Hawkins on Halloween night, chances are you were at this party.

You start to wonder how big this guy’s house must be if a couple hundred people have been attending every year, and it sounded like he even encouraged it.

You can hear the music bumping from the house before you even see it. It's hard to miss, a cluster of cars in the neighborhood, several people walking up the lawn towards the wide-open door. Your roommate’s boyfriend parks down the street, a spot that is probably fine to park overnight due to the nature of the party.

If there is to be a single sober soul at this party, they would be a rare sight.

You tug at your costume as you walk behind the two of them, strutting arm in arm. They’re wearing a matching couple’s costume, as salt and pepper. It’s something they could come up with last minute, him wearing a black shirt for pepper and her a white dress for salt. Their costume is minimal, and certainly they’ll get asked frequently what they’re supposed to be, but when everyone’s intoxicated, you suppose it won’t matter much.

You’re dressed as your favorite iconic Batman villain, Poison Ivy. You loved the character from the DC comics as you grew up and having a year away from your parents and in a different town, you figured it might be a time to try a new daring costume. So here you walk, arms crossed in a small green dress with fake vines pinned across your chest. You opted for some dramatic green eyeshadow and bright red lips, hoping your makeup and costume will sell the look.

Your ears are nearly bursting as you cross the threshold to the front door of the massive house from the loud bumping music. The pop music is a bit obnoxious, but you’re sure you won’t care once some alcohol is in your system.

Your roommate seems to remember you exist, escaping her boyfriend’s arms for the moment and intertwining her arm around yours. She immediately guides you to the kitchen where stacks of red solo cups are sitting, surrounded by bottles of alcohol and soda. “Holy shit.” You mutter.

“I know.” She giggles, handing you a cup and some tequila.

“No thanks.” You push it back, knowing what exactly tequila does to you. “I’ll just do a vodka-sprite.”

As you’re pouring, in waddles a lanky dude with brown curled hair and freckles scattered on his pale skin. “Oh hey, Mandy!” He greets her, stumbling as he toasts his cup. “Haven’t seen you in a while! How’s that boyfriend of yours?” He asks, spinning the lid of the alcohol he’s holding absentmindedly, causing it to flick off into the distance.

“Nate’s good, I think he’s taking over your stereo, though.” She says, moving the bottles around to make Nate’s drink, as well.

“As per usual.” He laughs, pouring a large quantity of said tequila into his cup.

Mandy seems to realize something halfway through her sip. “Oh shit!” She sputters out, a drip of alcohol leaving her mouth. “Sorry, I forgot you two don’t know each other, yet. Y/N, this is Steve. Steve, Y/N.”

“Hi.” You greet him shyly, his confidence radiating, but very intimidating.

“Hello. Me casa e su casa, and whatever, whatever. Can I just ask, who are you supposed to be?” He asks you, gesturing to your costume.

“Oh, Poison Ivy.” You explain to him, sipping on your concoction and wincing when you realize you’ve poured way too much.

Steve blinks at you, seemingly trying to make sense of your costume. “You’re—you’re a plant?”

You laugh, not in the mood to explain comic book villains to someone who clearly doesn’t know anything about them. “Yeah, sure.”

“Oh, cool!” Steve laughs, taking a big sip of his drink.

“Hey, Steve, you see much of Munson these days?” Mandy asks him, wiping her face from the excess drink surrounding her mouth.

How wonderful, more people you don’t know. Hawkins is the smallest town you’ve ever seen; everyone seems to know of everyone.

“Eddie? Yeah, he should be here tonight actually. Super dork, dressed as some character from Star Wars. Or at least I think it’s Star Wars.” He mutters, rolling his eyes in obvious affection for his friends. “He’s matching with Henderson and Wheeler.”

They shake their heads together in tandem at their supposedly dorky friends. As a Star Wars fan, however, you were fine, ecstatic even to hear that there were souls brave enough to dress up as dorky characters and that you weren’t the only one.

You follow Mandy into the living room, now bumping with a tape mix that Nate apparently brought to the party. It's a damn blast, everyone in the living room dancing surrounded by sweaty bodies, finally finding some joy as the strong drink makes you lose your inhibitions. As you continue dancing, suddenly you find yourself in a huddle of people, Mandy and Nate both dancing by you, but lost in their own drunken haze. You don’t care about that. However, something in your mind as you tell yourself you don’t care tells you to care about the person who’s been up against your back for God knows how long.

They have a good rhythm, and they weren’t all too touchy so nothing in your head raised any red flags. You turn around to face the stranger, and it’s like you forget how to breathe. One of his hands is placed on your hip, a smile on his face giving way to dimples that make you swoon. “Hi.” He greets you. You can’t quite hear it over the music, but you can certainly read his lips. Isn’t all that hard to decipher.

You smile back to him, letting a forearm rest on his shoulder. Who were you to deny such a pretty person? His wide smile expands even more, adding some pressure to your hip. The weight and size of his hand sends a thrill through you, and there’s a level of horniness that’s coming from you that you didn’t even know you could have.

Your drink is eventually finished, the cup dropped to the floor, forgetting to bother to throw it away. The gorgeous stranger pulls you in closer and closer as you continue to dance with him, his hands never dipping down past your waist, but you can tell by the steadiness of his grip that he knows how to use them. Usually, eye contact this intense would cause you to retract, looking away after that first glance. This eye contact only makes you want him more, his brown eyes exuding a type of lust you’ve never experienced before.

Or…were you just picturing this?

The hand that rested on your hip moves to frame your face, slender fingers brushing your cheek, caressing it for a half a moment. The hand moves down to hook under your chin, his thumb swiping across your bottom lip. His eyes very obviously stare at your lips, silently asking you for permission. When his tongue licks his bottom lip you nod eagerly, one hand moving to his black curls that you have been itching to touch as long as you’ve faced him.

Somehow, your ears muffle out the deafening music in favor of the chuckle that leaves his mouth. Before you could even register your heartbeat loud in your ears, he bends down to kiss you, and for the first time your brain computes how much taller he is than you. Any thought you might’ve had seems to evacuate the moment his soft lips meet yours. He kisses you with an expertise that makes you irrationally jealous of any other person who’s had the opportunity before you. He draws a sharp inhale as you deepen the kiss, offering more slobber and spit for him to wholeheartedly accept.

His hands tangle in your curled hair, thumbs caressing your face on either side. Something you're learning about this stranger is that he kisses with his whole body, and he knows how to do it well. His teeth graze against your bottom lip, tugging on it lightly. You whimper, shoving your tongue down his throat. A deep laugh escapes his throat as he meets your enthusiasm. He kisses the corner of your mouth, your cheek, and down to your collarbone. You barely sigh into it when his lips leave your collarbone, looking at you with remorse.

Uh oh. Not good. Were you the worst kisser and he was going to go find someone else worthy of his magical skills?

“Sorry, gotta piss. Beer’s hittin’ hard.” He shouts over the music, his thumb gesturing toward where you guessed the bathroom was.

“Ok. I’m gonna go get another drink.” You tell him, noting the red lipstick now all over his lips. “You got some uh…some lipstick there…hold on…” You reach out to wipe it for him, but he deflects, ducking from your thumb humorously.

“Uh…no thanks. I wear this shit with pride.” He explains, giving you a wink. “Meet you in the kitchen.”

You nod, suddenly full of nerves. You have been all over this guy for the last…however long, you couldn’t even tell. And now you’re realizing, he might be a decent dude on top of being a fantastic kisser.

Your legs carry you into the kitchen, running into Mandy and Nate. You weren’t sure where they’d been, having been lost in your own little world.

“Hi, babe!” She greets you, alcohol sharp on her breath. Whoa. She has had a lot more than you have. “I missed you, where the hell you been?”

You giggle, deciding to go for the tequila. After all, it was your literal liquid courage. And if you wanted to get that man’s fingers down your panties tonight, you were gonna need some. “Making out with the hottest guy I’ve ever seen in my life.” You proudly proclaim, taking a big sip of just straight tequila before adding some Sprite.

“Oh my god!” She squeals, letting go and forgetting about Nate’s existence. “Holy shit, I’m so fucking proud!” Speaking of him…he waltzes into the kitchen, grabbing a cup right by you and winking, apparently unseen by Mandy. “Shit, I’ve been looking for you!” She tells him, drunkenly tapping her hand on his bicep. “Hey, Y/N! This is Eddie. Remember? The dork Steve talked about earlier?”

Ouch. Mandy has no filter, as of course, she's drunk, but she didn’t have to be rude.

At least now you have a name for him. You were starting to feel bad. “Oh, I’m acquainted.” You tell her, sharing a smirk with Eddie.

“Seriously? Cool.” Mandy answers, not getting the hint. You gesture with your eyes alone to Mandy that Eddie was the guy you were talking about just a few moments ago. She gets it, but apparently forgets all about subtlety. “Wait, Eddie Munson is the hottest guy you’ve ever seen in your life?” She asks you incredulously, like it's the most unbelievable thing she's ever heard.

“Thanks, Mandy.” You grit out, teeth clenched.

“Oops.” She grimaces, grabbing Nate's hand. “We’re gonna go find a spot on the couch to make out. Sorry!”

You roll your eyes affectionately, knowing she meant no harm. Did she have to say it, though?

The smirk on Eddie’s face says everything without saying a word. “So, the hottest guy you’ve ever seen, huh?” He asks, looking incredibly proud of the fact.

You knock your tequila back, needing more liquid courage. “Yep. Hottest.”

His eyebrow raises, and he takes a big sip of his own drink. Maybe he needs his own courage. “Well, you’re probably the sexiest damn Poison Ivy I’ve ever seen.” He smirks, leering at you. His eyes blatantly rake up and down your body, giving you a surge in confidence. “You’re like a little sexy nugget of weed.” He laughs, his words slightly slurred.

“Wait, you get that I’m Poison Ivy?” You ask, finally assessing his costume. Oh, he’s Vader without the mask. “I mean I guess you are the dork they talked about earlier.” Eddie seems slightly sunken by this. “Don’t worry,” you tell him theatrically. “I’m a massive dork, myself.”

He perks up, pulling you in by the waist. “What do you say we find a room upstairs?” He asks, taking another big sip of his drink.

You raise your cup back to your lips, knocking the remainder down fast. “I say, lead the way.”

He grabs you by the hand and leads you up the stairs, pushing some people out of the way that were blocking it in the middle of a conversation. As he leads you down the hall, the music somewhat fades out and you can hear him muttering under his breath. “We better find a guest room cause I’m not hooking up in Harrington’s room, and I’ll be damned if I hook up in his parents' room.”

From that, you’re able to assess that he’s over here enough to know which room belongs to whom. He knocks on one of the doors, swearing softly when someone shouts out. He does it twice more, meeting the same result. “Ok.” He sighs, fingers crossed. He knocks twice, no answer. He knocks once more for good measure, and it can be said that there is definitely no one inside. “Thank fuck.”

As soon as you’re through the door he turns the dimmer switches on lightly and locks the door. You take off the vines, letting the pins and fake plants fall to the floor to make it easier for him to climb on you.

He watches you from the four postered bed, still head to toe in what you now noticed was the caped costume that Darth Vader wears. “So, we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with, by the way. If you wanna do hand stuff, we’ll do hand stuff.”

Your gut swoops at his consideration and empathy. He seems to truly care about your comfortability rather than him getting off. You walk to him, swiping off all accessories you wore, including your shoes. You straddle his lap, pushing on him lightly so he falls back onto the bed. You attack his lips with your own, attempting to show how much his consideration for you already has you soaked. “I will do” you whisper in between a handful of kisses, “anything you want me to,” you tell him, starting to grind the tent you feel poking past your dress. “Within reason.” You add for good measure, not quite that down for anything. But if he wants to fuck you, you’re down. You’re so down. You’re so down bad.

“Fuck…do that again.” He asks, holding your hips. You comply, grinding your wet heat against him, teasing yourself, but loving the expression on his face. It's ethereal. “Fuck, baby. You barely touched me, and you already have me falling apart.”

This makes you smile with pride. A huff of laughter escapes your lips, sighing deeply as you can feel his erection growing. The fact that this man is as hard as he is when he’s this good looking is the biggest compliment in the world. You wrap his lips in a kiss again, your tongue peeking out to lick across his lip, managing to tug yet another moan out of him. You relish in the tone, the whimper that follows right after it. He really isn’t afraid to tell you how much he is enjoying what the two of you are doing.

As you continue to explore his tequila-scented mouth, both of his hands cup your ass, feeling his limber fingers bunch up the fabric of the bright green dress you’re wearing. He takes his time, giving you every minute to communicate any second thoughts. You moan impatiently, encouraging him to get under there already.

He chuckles, pulling the rest of the material up swiftly. His fingers grab at the skin of your barely covered ass cheeks roughly, the friction burning in the best way. A whimper escapes your throat, your mouth filling with the taste of him as your tongues meet. You’re sure he’s gripping those cheeks hard enough to bruise, not that you mind.

An increasing need has been growing since you first laid eyes on him, the need for him to touch you in the most sinful of ways. While his touch on your ass is electric, you are ready for much more. Your whimpers echo the thought, feeling needy for more of his touch, your hip movements going from fluid and purposeful to rigid and needy.

“What do you need, hmm?” He asks in-between kisses, one hand pushing up your dress to your waist as it caresses your bare hip. “Use your words, beautiful.”

“Need you to touch me,” the thought leaves your lips without your permission. How dare your brain betray you like that?

Eddie starts to kiss at your jaw, switching between nibbles and his tongue deliciously lapping at the skin. “Like how?” He asks in intervals, his voice soft, yet demanding. “Like this?” He grabs harshly at your ass, nails digging into the soft flesh. “Like this?” He asks again, tingles radiating down your skin as he lightly grazes your hip bone. “Or…like this?” His hand that rested on your hip bone flutters down to where heat radiates off your core, getting a feel of your soaked panties. “Oh my god, you’re so fucking wet.” He mutters, putting some pressure at the top of your mound.

Your hips start desperately grinding against his fingers, needing him to touch you. “Can you blame me?” You ask him, breath stuttering through it.

“Are you trying to flatter me?” He asks, pausing his pressure momentarily and backing off to study you. You stutter through an empty response, and he laughs kindly. “Cause flattery works, sweetheart.” His fingers move past the cotton barrier he's been making small circles against, delicately tracing along the wetness of your folds. You’re so slick, it’s like a damn slip and slide. The moment his fingers make contact with you, they’re soaked and in your juices.

“Oh shit—” you stutter, grinding on him helplessly. You can barely focus, your arms weak as you’re suddenly unable to hold your weight as you collapse on him. He's not touching you purposely, but just the feel of him sends a ripple down your spine. “Feels good.”

“Hmm.” He answers, noting the way you’re writhing so beautifully on top of him. He knew he would have you in a mess. In fact, he looked forward to it from the moment he saw you. He meticulously moves you onto your back, taking in your wide-eyed stare with a smirk. “Gonna take these off.” He mutters, fingers moving to the waistband of your panties. “Need a good look at you.”

You’re not entirely sure what he means until you see the look on his face as he stares at your pussy for the first time. His darkened stare, the slack smile he wears as he stares at you. Well not you, just the most vulnerable part of you. You’ve had a bit of experience in high school, but no one ever looked at your pussy like this. Like…it’s…

“Beautiful.” Eddie whispers, licking his lips. You watch him as he takes you in, admiring how wanted he makes you feel. Without a warning he lurches forward in between your legs, his tongue licking one long strip up your slick. Your thighs convulse, the pleasure so red hot, you can’t control the choked-out moan that escapes your lips if you tried. “Oh, you’re shaking, baby.”

His tongue moves more purposely to your clit, sucking on it and tapping with his tongue repeatedly. Your thighs clamp around his face, tensing up as every goddamn nerve is set on fire. You feel a slight huff of laughter against your puffy clit, the breath tickling you, causing you to giggle from the sensation. The giggle leads into a whimper, the small movements of his tongue sending you into overdrive. “Feels so—oh my god—I—” You stutter, unable to finish a single sentence.

He tugs your legs, forcing your knees against your chest to get even closer. A fierce heat starts in your stomach, startling the hell out of you. A great build slowly moves you, pushing you step by step over a high you’ve never reached before. Your stomach has never coiled so tightly, the heat never so intense. “Too much, too much.”

“You’re almost there, sweetheart.” He encourages you, watching every muscle in your legs tighten and feeling your abdomen tighten and release. “Oh, it’s gonna feel so good, baby. Wanna see you cum for me, see you fall apart, hear that pretty little mouth make the prettiest noises.”

Eddie slips a finger in, pumping it slowly at first, building up the speed quickly as he continues sucking. There’s something in you telling you to be embarrassed at how quickly your orgasm has snuck up on you, but from the foreplay of his expert lips and the mind-numbing words, it only makes sense.

“Cl-close…” You manage out, the heat making your way through your body, even making a stop in your head.

“Let me see you come apart, sweetheart.” He tells you, working his fingers at an unmatched rate.

The sensation sends you over the edge, your extremities shaking uncontrollably. Your eyes roll into the back of your head, a near primal moan leaves your mouth, a sound you didn’t even know you had the capability of making.

It takes you a minute to recover, Eddie working you through your whole orgasm and gently kissing your thighs until you come back to. He’s patient, waiting until your breathing slows down, kissing his way up your half-dressed torso. Eddie rests his body on yours, the tent in his pants meeting the heat of your center as his forearms support his weight on either side of your head. His thumbs sway at your temple, slowly watching as your eyes lose their glaze.

Your vision finally focuses back on him, his soft smile on his face welcoming as he watches you. His legs tense up, his muscles spasming as he resists thrusting into your heat. It’s teasing you, your hips accidentally moving upwards to meet the now wet stain on his polyester costume. “You’re wearing too much.” You tell him, whining softly.

“I’m sorry, should I take these off?” He asks, kissing you rapidly on the face right after. “Or if you’re done, I don’t blame you.”

“Done?” You ask incredulously. “Oh no, I’m not even close to done.” You tell him, giggling when he gives you a smirk.

“Just checking, sweetheart.” Eddie replies, kissing you rapidly again.

You’re finally back on earth, your hands reaching around him to look for where his costume opens. You had a feeling it would open from the back. You pull each Velcro apart one by one, your hands telling you as you move down that he’s not wearing anything underneath. You don't know if it's odd or the hottest thing in the world. Both, definitely both.

Your nails scratch at his skin at the last one, finally taking the shoulders off. You gasp as he helps you take out each arm awkwardly, only because you could finally see all the tattoos that his costume has covered up. “Holy shit.” You mutter, hands reaching out to palm at each one.

As he mouths at your neck, you push the rest of his costume down, figuring out it was a one piece. Ok. Steve might’ve been right about calling him a dork. But with his cunnilingus skills, who fucking cares? “You wanna fuck?” He asks, making his way down your neck, one hickey at a time.

You wrap your legs around his waist, tugging him down so the thin fabric meets your soaked pussy even harder. “Please?”

“When you ask so nicely, how could I deny?” He answers, leaving one last final nibble on your shoulder. He gets up without a warning, and you whine pathetically. “Jus’ takin off my pants sweetheart. Can’t put my dick in you if it’s still covered.”

You watch him pull down his pants, teasing you as it makes its way down his torso, his treasure trail, the v-line, you start drooling the moment his cock pops out. You figured he was big from his bulge pressed against you, but the material was apparently holding him back from his true length. You spend a good minute staring at it, how pink the head is, how thick he looks, it made you nearly feral.

“Enjoying the show?” Eddie asks. You glance back up at his face, heating up when you realize you've stared a lot longer than planned.

“Mmmhmm.” You tell him, not seeing any need to deny.

He lurches forward onto the bed, yanking giggles out of you. His hands roughly move up your torso to take your dress off, moving it over your head. He throws it over his shoulder, eyes raking in your tits like they’re in the Louvre. Hell, he’d take a polaroid and hang it there, despite the risk of security arresting and escorting him out immediately after.

“You are fucking gorgeous, baby.” He mutters, leaning into one of your tits mouthing at the nipple delicately, grazing it with his teeth, turning the mound into a shade of purple.

You can’t help yourself, reaching down to grab his cock. “Need you in me.” You urge him, smiling when he lets out a surprised whimper.

“Fucking—” he stutters out, biting on his lip. “Yeah, yeah, okay. I can do that.” He laughs, and before you have a moment to admire how adorable that was, you feel him line himself up. “Shit, you’re fucking tight.”

You can feel exactly what he means, the head barely pushing in. Even with how wet you are, Eddie's having difficulty pushing into you. Your mouth drops open, panting through it at the blinding pain and pleasure. He pauses, giving you a moment to adjust. “Feels so goddamn good, Ed.” You gasp, blindly reaching for him.

Blindly, because your eyes are unable to stay open from the sheer pleasure that has taken over your body.

“I know, baby I know.” He whispers, holding one hand to your face.

“Ok.”

He pushes in more, eliciting a high-pitched whine out of you. “You have any idea how fucking hot those little noises that you make are?” He asks, his voice husky and strained.

You laugh at his successful attempt at flattery, causing him to whine at the way your pussy tightens around him in sync. “Keep going.”

He pushes in a little bit more, your legs tensing around his torso as the noise caught in your throat is even louder. “You’re taking me so well, baby, what a good girl.” You tighten up at his praise, provoking Eddie to get the idea that praise is something that you desire. “Oh, you liked that, didn’t you, my good girl?” You tighten around him again, Eddie twitching in you as a response.

“More.” You manage out, your voice guttural. He pushes in just a little bit more. “Oh my god, you’re in my fucking stomach, so fucking deep!” You whine, eyes closed as you pulse around him.

“Just a little bit more, baby. You’re doing so well, such a good girl.”

“More.”

He pushes the rest of his cock in, finally able to rest his body on yours. You take your time adjusting to his size, inhaling, and exhaling with purpose as the pain subsides. “That’s a girl, take your time.” He mutters, watching you carefully.

“Kiss me please.” You whisper, opening your eyes to face the intensity radiating from his chocolate brown ones. He leans in for a lush kiss, your legs wrapping around him to pull him in tightly. His hand moves to your tit, playing with the nipple between two of his fingers. Your tongues meet, somehow knowing exactly what the other needs. “You can move now.” You whisper in between kisses.

Eddie, apparently a master at multitasking, lifts his hips without so much as stuttering in the kiss. You expected him to stop, but the new mix of sensation throws you off intensely. His first thrust causes you to shout directly into his mouth. You’re much more prepared for the second thrust, however unprepared for the force behind it. “Yeah?” He asks, pulling back and staring into your eyes.

You nod enthusiastically. “So good. Cock feels…so good.” You whine to him, legs unable to continue holding onto him as tight as they were. Now they’re floating in the air aimlessly, unable to focus on much except for how good and how deep he is. “How…this good?” The question you meant to ask was how he was so good at fucking like this, but your mouth was unable to form a single coherent sentence.

“Barely been in you for a minute, and you’re already cock-drunk, huh?” He borderline mocks you, fucking you faster with each thrust.

You grunt in response, fully accepting the label of cock drunk. “So…good, Eddie!” It’s just…fucking true, which is the only rational thought in your brain for the moment. Others are So Hot, and Big Ass Cock, and finally, Gorgeous fucking body.

“Your pretty pussy is so tight, baby, bein’ such a good girl for me.” Eddie sits up, pulling your ass down to where he can fuck you in a better position where he can hit your g-spot. He rests a hand sideways on your lower tummy, putting slight pressure on it. This sends a blinding hot pleasure into you as he repeatedly hits that spot.

“F-fuck, get-getting cl-close…” you stutter, feeling your tits bounce at the sheer force he's fucking you with.

“This is fucking embarrassing, but so am I, baby.” He mutters, starting to go at a faster rate, which you would've deemed impossible a few seconds ago. “Your pussy is so fucking good, can’t fuckin’ help myself.”

You half giggle, half moan at the flattery, not minding for one moment that he would cum so quickly. After all, he spent the first half paying most of his attention to you, so you understand if he's been pent up. While that is the reality of why, you can’t help but feel like hot shit for making someone as fantastic as Eddie cum so fast. His stamina and willingness to give on top of how gorgeous he is does nothing but boost your ego.

“Cum with me.” You beg him, also on the edge. “Cum in me.”

“Oh my god—” you make his hips stutter, and you smile with pride. “You sure, baby?” He asks, trying to make sure he covers his tracks.

“Cum in me, please, daddy!” It leaves your mouth before you’re unable to stop it, the daddy kink not quite something you break out on the first fuck most of the time.

Eddie, however, is a different breed. He meets the unexpected outburst with a growl, and you swear his cock twitches inside of you. “Of course, baby girl, whatever you want.” He grunts out. “Daddy is gonna fill you the fuck up.” He lurches forward so he’s skin on skin with you again so he can whisper in your ear. “When we go back downstairs, I’m gonna keep your panties, and you're gonna dance with my cum dripping down your fucking legs.” You tighten up around him, telling Eddie this is exactly what you wanted from him. The sweet mixture of praise and degradation makes your head spin with need. “You like that, huh? Of course, you’d like that you fucking slut.” His hips rut harshly against yours and at a stupid crazy speed. “If I catch you trying to clean yourself up, you’re gonna fucking hear about it, got it?”

You nod, entirely thrilled about this.

“Didn’t fuckin hear you, slut.”

“Got it, daddy.” You answer, right on the edge.

“You gonna cum with me, baby girl?” He asks, his voice strained.

“Mmhmm. Waiting for you.”

“Good fucking girl. I’m so close…fuck…gonna—” Eddie is interrupted by his own orgasm, which sends you over the edge with him. It’s not as intense as your last one, so you’re able to pay extra attention to the look on his face. His mouth half open, a deep moan leaving his throat. Oh god, you’ll definitely be remembering this next time it’s only you and your imagination.

He collapses on you, his chest and forehead covered in sweat. The only sound in the air is you and Eddie catching your breath together. Your breath is finally back in your lungs, but your heart is still racing against his chest. He suddenly sits himself back on his forearms, petting at your forehead and hair gently. “Fuck, please go out with me on Saturday.” He whispers, quietly assessing the expression you wear on your face.

“Huh?” You ask him, unsure you heard him correctly.

“Go out with me on Saturday. Please, I can’t fuck a pussy this good and not take you out on a hot date.” He mutters softly, placing the gentlest of kisses on your lips.

“If you think I’m letting you go after this, you’re fucking insane.” You whisper back, framing his face to grab it for another lush kiss.

Eddie sighs, petting your hair. “Thank fucking god.” He pulls out of you, tugging a whimper out of you. He gives one last kiss, before moving down your torso. You almost ask what he was doing, when you feel two of his fingers push inside you quickly.

Your head jerks up, wondering what in the ever-living hell he's doing.

“Just helping by pushing the cum back in you, baby. Wanted to give you at least a fighting chance before it starts dripping down these stunning thighs of yours.” He places a wet kiss on your thigh, one last quiver radiating through it. “You good to stand up?”

“Hope so.” You laugh, scooching your ass down the plain comforter. Eddie tosses you your dress and gets dressed back into his cheap costume himself.

You assess Eddie, fixing his hair so he doesn’t look so disheveled. “You realize my lipstick is all over your neck and face, right?” You ask him, assessing him in all his post-nut glory. How the fuck is anyone this hot?

“Didn't I tell you earlier that I'm gonna wear this shit with pride, darlin?” He asks you, giving you a smile that makes you melt. “Wanna go downstairs and make-out on Steve's dad’s stupid chair?”

“If we make out I might wanna blow you.” You admit, the effects of the alcohol and the level of his hotness has still completely taken over your brain.

Eddie groans, and you swear his pupils dilate. “Fuck, I’ll take you into the nearest hallway closet if that happens, then you can get on your knees and suck my cock off like a good girl. You just tell me, yeah?”

You giggle as he opens the door and you nod enthusiastically, pretty much already in your head that hooking up with Eddie is nowhere near done.

When you reach the bottom of the steps, Eddie tugs on your hand straight to the leather chair in the corner, having you sit across his lap as his tongue makes its way down your throat again.

Eventually, after a mere ten minutes of teasing, Eddie has to lead you to a hallway closet, where yes, you worship him on your knees with his treasure trail meeting your nose.

That was the best fucking Halloween, ever.

Thank you so much for reading! I love to read your comments, replies, and reblogs. As always, reblogging is the best way to support your fic writers on tumblr.

Taglist: @pinkcowracing @yourthebrokengirl @skrzydlak @thirddeadlysin @sammararaven @bebe07011 @prettylovley @josephquinnschesthair @forget-you-morelike-fuck-you @names-were-taken @oddussy420

#eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x f!reader

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pluckyredhead · 4 months ago

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“I have larger thoughts about how DC has kind of written themselves into a hole with Jason and now he's stuck in this limbo that's unsatisfying to everyone which is why so many Jason fans are mad all the time, but that's for another ask.”

🤓 Do tell…

Okay, let's see if I can do this in less than a thousand words!

So Jason, at his core, represents a challenge to Bruce's ideology, right? Bruce's #1 rule is No Killing, and Jason's basic idea is: "That doesn't work. Some villains are bad enough that they have to be killed for the greater good." (There's something very funny about Jason, famously undead, thinking killing stops ANYONE in the DCU, but we'll leave that aside for now.) This is a really interesting ethical quandary to throw Bruce's way, and by having it voiced by his beloved son, his greatest failure, his second most profound tragedy, it becomes a deeply thorny emotional problem as well as an ethical problem. That's all great.

The problem is, DC can't allow Jason to be right, for two reasons:

Batman must always be right and must always win.

...I mean, come on. They can't actually publish a story advocating for a traumatized 19-year-old with assault weapons to be the arbiter of who lives and who dies, that's nonsense. I love Jason but really.

The problem with that is, Jason is a major recurring character.

UTRH works great in a vacuum. But if Jason is showing up in a comic every month, or even just a few times a year, this central conflict has to be addressed, and the options for doing that are limited:

Bruce and Jason fight and Jason wins. DC will never let this happen. (And what would "Jason wins" even look like, honestly? He's not going to kill Bruce.)

Bruce and Jason fight and Bruce wins. They've done this a bunch (sometimes with Dick in place of Bruce), but Jason fans don't want to see him repeatedly getting his ass kicked while being lectured, and frankly it doesn't make Bruce look great either.

Bruce allows Jason to kill people. This can't happen either; it would be wildly out of character for Bruce, not to mention literally everyone in the Batfamily. They are all canonically pretty opposed to murder.

Jason continues to operate however he wants, but outside of Bruce's reach/jurisdiction. As wretched as RHATO was, I actually think it was a smart decision to keep most of the action outside of Gotham, because then we can pretend Bruce doesn't know what Jason's up to, just like we pretend Clark couldn't super-hear everything in Gotham and save Bruce's ass every single night without breaking a sweat. The problem here is that it means Jason is unavailable for the kinds of casual team-ups and crossovers that fans of all stripes crave - plus, every time he comes back to Gotham, he and Bruce have to relitigate their entire relationship AGAIN.

Jason compromises and agrees to follow Bruce's rules in order to have a relationship with the Batfamily. This is basically where DC has landed, and I understand why they did, because it's the option that allows them to publish the most comics with Jason in them, which they want to do because he is an immensely popular character who makes them money. However, it leaves him in this awkward position where instead of being a tragic villain/badass antihero, he's just...the sassiest member of the family, while simultaneously always being available to be treated like shit because he's Bad. He gets punished without even the fun of doing the crime anymore.

So what's the solution? I don't know. Theoretically, DC could try to do what Marvel does with the Punisher. People always get mad when I say Jason is DC's Punisher, but he kills pretty much indiscriminately in UTRH and RHATO, for pretty much the same reasons. ("Dudebros think it looks cool.") And Marvel heroes inexplicably let Frank just kill however many people he wants unless they're appearing in a Punisher comic, at which point they go "Frank, you naughty boy, I shall stop you!" and then Frank kicks their ass and makes them look like an idiot. DC is never going to let Jason do that to Bruce, plus it would put a real damper on the Wayne family Thanksgiving dinner.

Alternately, they could make him a Nightwing villain. Dick has spent 40 years fighting inconclusively with Deathstroke; he's much better suited to go endless rounds with Jason without either of them Always Triumphantly Winning than Bruce is. I don't personally want this option because I just don't care that much about Dick, but it could be really interesting, though it would limit Jason to fewer appearances and primarily in Dick's book. (Jason would have made a superb Red Robin villain 15 years ago for similar reasons.)

My vote, I think, would be for a really good (god, if only), really thoughtful Jason series where he has reason to seriously reevaluate his philosophy towards crime - something that reshapes him into a character who can still challenge Bruce's entrenched ideas without being so diametrically opposed to them as to make him a villain. He needs to be close enough to Bruce's rules to appear in crossovers, but far enough and specific enough that he's not just Meaner Nightwing. Jason is a passionate character; DC needs to find a new way to let his passion work for him, because right now he doesn't have anything driving him, and it's satisfying no one.

(900 words, BOOM!)

#jason todd #red hood #meta

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stealingyourbones · 1 year ago

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Are there any rogues in the dc or dp universe that are irritatingly pro Christmas?

you know,,, I genuinely don't know on the dp side of things, for the dc side though,,, Calendar Man is sorta pro Christmas. His entire thing is doing devious plots and murders on Holidays. He's obsessed with the Calendar and most definitely done some Christmas murders. TBF the dude is fully insane and worships the Calendar like its a god so I don't know if that's the vibe of a villain you're going for. There's also the Holiday Killer from the Long Halloween batman comics. The dude was less obsessed with the Holidays in depth and more just killed during them if I remember correctly (It's been so long since I've read the Long Halloween im so sorry) And this isn't a rogue but I don't know who else would be more irritatingly pro Christmas in DC other than Santa Claus himself. He exists as essentially a god in the DC universe and every year storms through the defenses of Apokolips to hand Darkseid a single lump of coal. There's also that Christmas comic where Lobo kills evil boxer Santa (its a long story). absolutely no clue if that helps but if anyone else has any characters they know who are inclined to enjoy christmas, please reply!

#bones replies #dpxdc

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katamiss · 3 months ago

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Why can't queer heros be with queer heros. Like every single hero who is queer in DC is with a civilian, Tim drake, and Benard jon kent with Jay even Kate Kane was with a civilian. It was the commissioner, so at least she knew about the vigilante stuff, but you get my point.

Now I do adore these relationships and find the civilian x hero to be fun, but i also think it can be so messy and to me doesnt always feel genuine, like you love this person but your hiding a major part about you (and putting them in danger) . Some civilian relationships do work, but why does every single queer relationship have to be with a "non main character". Who we don't get to truly see in other comics or in their own comics

I just want queer heros to be with queer heros It's like Dick grayson can be with Kori and Baraba, and batman can be thrown at every hero who is a woman ever but never queer heros they are always with civilians.

And maybe that's because DC is too scared to make "too" many queer heros but it just feels so sad that we can't get all the fun, messy and sad tropes that come with a hero x hero relationship with all these wonderful queer characters

The only version we kinda have is harley and ivy which is good and I think we all appreciate but there is so many other confirmed queer charachters who are heros and not villains (anti heros now i believe though) I want so true heros to be queer I don't want our main queer charachters to be villains like it always is in all media

Why can't Tim and Kon date or Jon and Damien. Or idk wonderwoman since she's canonically bisexual but god forbid we let that woman date any woman. Let dick grayson be officially queer since he's on every single DC pride poster. Let him date a man. Or let Stephanie Brown be officially bisexual like many people, and even writers see her as and let her date Cass because people also see her as queer. Honestly, there are so many other charachters that I personally don't quite know well enough to write on. But either way, can we just please have queer heroes date other queer heros instead of being stuck in this shitty loop of Lgbtq heros can never be with other lgbtq heros

(If there are any hero x hero that are queer that I am uninformed about, please do tell me I would love to read about them and be proven wrong)

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echoarts03 · 1 month ago

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My Favorite Batman Villains and Why

(In no particular order)

────────────────────────────

As a cartoon/movie/video game Batman fan, let's go over some of my favorite villains, shall we?

────────────────────────────

1.) THE JOKER

Is this a basic answer?

Sure, but I don't give a shit! I really enjoy the Joker! I think he's hysterical in most of the Batman adaptations I've seen (yes, INCLUDING the LEGO Batman movie,) and there's just something about villains who are absolutely bonkers-crazy that really catches my attention.

2.) SCARECROW

BRO. IS. COOL.

His gimmick is FEAR, and if that isn't a really fucking cool concept then idk what is.

DOCTORS THAT TURN INTO VILLAINS HAS GOT TO BE QUITE POSSIBLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE TROPES.

#PutScarecrowinmoreshows2024

3.) TWO-FACE

To be fair, I have no clue what drew me in to Harvey's character.

Maybe it's the idea of him once being such a respectable guy, and then one nearly-fatal accident turned him into a shell of his former self, or maybe it's just because mob bosses are awesome fuckin' characters, imo.

Or maybe it's just because I like his designs.

Who knows, man? XD

────────────────────────────

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

────────────────────────────

THE PENGUIN

A funny little penguin man running a mob is honestly kinda funny to me.

Also, I loved how much of a goblin he was in the 2004 cartoon, and I think we need to manifest more of that side of him into media, lol.

(I also plan to watch "THE PENGUIN" soon, but I'm currently watching 2 DC shows at once so I gotta finish at least one of those first XD)

SLADE/DEATHSTROKE

BRO IS A MENACE.

I ADORED THIS MOTHERFUCKER SO MUCH IN TEEN TITANS (2003) IT AIN'T EVEN FUNNY.

That version of him was by FAR one of the best-written villains of all time.

The only reason I put him in "honorable mentions" is because I don't see him as a Batman villain. I grew up watching him fight the Teen Titans, so to me, Slade is the Teen Titans' villain.

Also, yeah, I'm calling him Slade because that's what I grew up calling him. So just don't go expecting me to call him Deathstroke every single time I'm talking about him, alright? XD

BANE

I mean, he isn't my FAVORITE, but I do like him a lot- ESPECIALLY in The Dark Knight trilogy. They kinda did bro dirty in BTAS, but I guess they can't all be bangers!

Also, I will protect THQS Bane with my LIFE.

────────────────────────────

But yeah, here's my list of my big favorites :D Hope you like it!

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little-pondhead · 2 years ago

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My favorite thing about your villain Fenton au is just that he's a villain from like 1940s/50s DC. Like he's all camp no edge. But also he wins which makes it 2000% funnier than the idk The Riddler did in that time period.

Fenton's loose! And this time, he's been inspired by his parent's VHS collection of their favorite Saturday morning cartoons

(yes, I know the VHS tape wasn't available on the market until 1976 but work with me here)

Watch out, Gotham!

Ope, an anvil to the head? No worse than a pillow when it hits you, but it still weighs 200 pounds when you try to pick it up normally.

Walked straight off a random cliff without realizing it? Well, as long as you keep looking up, and don't question where the cliff came from, you'll be fine! Everyone knows gravity doesn't work until you look down.

Be careful of what strangers give you since it might literally blow up in your face! The large white presents tied with a red bow either contain banana cream pies or dynamite. Neither will really hurt you, but the dynamite powder is so hard to clean off with regular soap; it's a nightmare!

---

Fenton somehow manages to pull off every single old cartoon gag he's ever seen without actually harming anyone. But at the same time, he can invent and use technology that the DC universe is decades away from implementing. It drives the more tech-savvy heroes and villains nuts trying to figure out he pulls these stunts off.

#pondhead replies #supervillain danny au #dpxdc

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osidius-el-enfatico · 3 months ago

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NICO'S SO YOU WANNA READ SOMETHING OTHER THAN MARVEL AND DC

hello everybody, I'm Nico, you might know me from being a fucking hater and a gross nerd and I'm here to tell you that you don't have to be whipped around by the big 2, there's a world of good shit out there, we can go find it together. come, take my hand.

The ones everyone will tell you about

these are the ones you are supposed to read, even if you mainly read big 2 stuff.

go on, read Hellboy (here's a reading order list, it gets dicey but I believe in you). go on, read saga. go on, read blacksad. go on, read something is killing the children. go on, read Locke and key

ok, with these out of the way, let's begin

so you want to read super hero type stuff

1. black hammer by Jeff lemire et al.

in the past, black hammer (the greatest supper hero) and six superheroes of his team save the city but in the process get sucked into a parallel dimension, in the 10 years since they have tried everything to go back to their world without much success, but there's still superheroing to do.

2. minor threats by Patton oswalt et al.

one of the biggest villains in the city murders the robin analogue in this world. which causes the heroes to go hog wild and turn everything into a police state. in the middle of it all, the small time villains who just want to rob a store or turn dogs into cats or whatever are caught in the line of fire of a fight way above their pay grade.

3. America's got powers by Johnathan Ross and Bryan hitch

18 years ago an alien crystal of unknown origin fell from the sky in San Francisco, at that same moment every pregnant woman in the city gave birth to a superpowered child. today, all of the babies are used as gladiators in a reality show that can bring them fame and fortune or death. the only kid to be born that day without superpowers is thrust all the same into the arena to fend for himself.

4. buzzkill by Donny cates and mark reznicek

imagine you're the biggest superhero there is, but to get each of your individual super powers you had to consume a different drug everytime you wanted to use it. imagine that this breaks every single relationship you have and you want to go clean. imagine also that the city still needs you. what is your obligation to your city over yourself?

the first two titles are more akin to big 2 comics with an expansive universe and several smaller titles to accompany the main one.

so you want to read a little freak

1. bone by Jeff Smith

go read bone. do it now. phoney bone gets expelled from his natal city from his latest scheme to get rich. in the process he drags out of the city his cousins smiley bone and fone bone, our hero. in the process of escaping the three get separated and each one gets into his own adventures that unfold a dark tale in the valley they end up on. a dark fantasy comedy for all ages

2. good bye, chunky rice by Craig thompson

a small turtle leaves his home and his friends because he feels he has done all he can in this particular stage of his life. he explores love and loss throughout his trip

3. Krazy Kat by George herriman

this is one of the most influential newspaper strips of the early 20th century. Krazy is a cat in love with ignatz the mouse who fucking hates him. krazy's biggest want in life is to get his love reciprocated, ignatz just wants to throw bricks at krazy's head

so you want to bawl your eyes out

1. primordial by Jeff lemire and Andrea Sorrentino.

one of the scientists in charge of the Laika space launch is convinced she is still up there somewhere and is adamant to get her back. at the same time the last launch with monkey is going into space. on one side we see the scientists working and dealing with the ethical ramifications of their work, on the other we see the critters and their limited sentience of what is happening.

2. the lil depressed boy by Isabel struble and Sina grace

the lil depressed boy (or ldb as everyone calls it) is a sack boy like the one in little big planet, but one who is a fucking nerd and likes indie music and bowling, he navigates through life without direction, finding temporary relief in one thing or another, but ultimately a lost souls just doing whatever he can to stay afloat. you will find this under the author's deadname, but after her transition Isabel seems to have shed the veil that made this autobiographical story happen. good-for-her.gif

3. essex county by jeff lemire

this is a trilogy of books based around the area in which jeff lemire grew up in with only a geographical connection uniting them. a young boy has his whole world turned upside down with no one to guide him through it. a pair of brothers who did everything together grow apart and end up hating each other in adulthood. a rural nurse reckons with how she can only do so much for the people that depend on her. this was also adapted for canadian tv but i really havent seen it yet, so i dont know how that went

so you want to read about important stuff

1. Maus by art spielgman

this probably should have gone in the first part of things everyone tells you to read but I'd be remiss not mentioning it directly. it is the only comic to win a Pulitzer, art spielgman tells us how his father tells him his story during the Holocaust. it is harrowing, raw, and gruesome. but it still retains a glimmer of better things, art's father is funny in his relationship with art which give you little respites to all the shit going on

2. march by John Lewis with Andrew Aydin and Nate Powell

yes, the John Lewis who marched next to Martin Luther king. this is his autobiographical account of the civil rights movement in the 60s. it is insightful but raw. still feeling it all in the present day.

3. Vaincus mais vivants. chile 1973 by Maximilien leroy

I hate french people but they're good at this comic book shit. this Tells the tale of commandante Carmen and commandante Miguel, heads of the MIR (movimiento de izquierda revolucionaria-revolutionary leftist movement) before and during the USA backed coup in Chile in 1973. how they had worked before it went down, and how they hid to try to survive the persecution.

4. footnotes in Gaza by Joe sacco

Joe sacco is a journalist who does comics on the side. in this stand out he tries to tell the story of the Khan Yunis and rafah massacres in 1956 through interviews with palestinians alive at the time, while interweaving the current (to 2003) situation in rafah. another account of the monster that is Israel and the resilience of the Palestinian people.

so you want to laugh

1. the tick by Ben endlund

you have seen the cartoon. the tick is a dumbass who is also the biggest hero in naked city. go read this shit, just pick up whatever volume you find, continuity isn't really a thing here

2. imagine agents by Brian Joines and bachan

this is basically men in black but instead of aliens they have to control and keep the people from knowing about the reality of imaginary friends kids abandon and how they can get out of control. it's so stupid

so you want to read a western

1. east of west by Jonathan hickman and Nick dragotta

much like in reality, the USA is a dystopian land but in this book there's also science fiction. and the only begins that can save that shit hole are the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

2. Shaolin cowboy by Geoff Darrow

like east of west, this mixes science fiction with western. but this is pretty simple. he's a Shaolin monk who is also a cowboy, and he has to get out of situations. one time it was a flying shark, another one it was zombies. and so on and so forth *zizek voice*

3. six gun gorilla by Simon spurrier and Jeff stokely

in a world colonized in the future after earth was ran dry of respurces by greed, one single gunslinger tries to bring order to the land. he happens to be a biologically enhanced gorilla

so you want to get experimental

jimmy corrigan: the smartest kid on earth by chris ware

simply put, this shit is the house of leaves of comics. some dude get the opportunity to meet his dad for the first time at the age of 36. its simple enough but this takes you for a visual ride.

2. asterios polyp by david mazzuchelli

again, this story is simple enough. a professor gets his house torched by thunder and escapes the city to star anew somewhere else. but you get the story told by people who dont exist, jumping between past and present.

3. almost silent by jason

jason's stories are pantomime. his anthropomorphic characters dont emote too much, but you can feel them. this collection of stories focuses on his stories that have almost no dialogue at all.

so you want gays

are you listening? by tillie walden

this isnt a love story. but it is a story of connection and deep understanding, of someone else and yourself. theres also a magical cat in it.

2. laura dean keeps breaking up with me by mariko tamaki and rosemary valero-o'connell

laura dean is the protagonist's on again, off again girlfriend. she is also a cunt. freddy keeps distancing herself from her circle due to laura's games and manipulation. but she has to learn how to keep herself afloat in this vortex.

shit you need to read because its important to the art form

a contract with god by will eisner

this is the originator of the term graphic novel. its a triology of stories which are in the vein of a lot of eisner's comics, simple pictures of life in a jewish neighborhood in new york. but told with such mastery of the craft that they pull you in like nothing else.

2. calvin & hobbes by bill watterson

yeah, yeah. i know. you know calvin and hobbes. you love calvin and hobbes. go read the whole thing from start to finish tho, go do it right now.

3. hicksville by dylan horrocks

this is universailly described as a love letter to comics as a medium. it tells you a biographical account of dylan horrocks life. it also tells you a biographical account of sam zabel, a character of horrock's that appears in much of his ouvre. it also tells you a story of intrigue and mystery surrounding the biggest comic creator in the world, dick burger (yeah, thats his name). it is also my favorite comic.

list of good shit that i couldnt fit into a theme and im also bored of this now so heres just a loooong list

the many deaths of laila starr by ram v and filipe andrade

judas by jeff loveness and jakub rebelka

the loneliness of the long distance cartoonist by adrian tomine

un homme est mort by etienne davodeau and kris

el hombre que vino del cielo by infame & co.

box office poison by alex robinson

fishflies by jeff lemire

andre the giant. life and legend by box carr

le retorneur by freederik peeters

elks run by joshua hale fialkov and noel tuazon

just so happens by fumio obata

ody-c by matt fraction and chris ward

trenches by scott mills

#comics

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zebrashavestripes · 2 days ago

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Riddlebird Week Day 7: Legacy

To celebrate the final day of Riddlebird week I wanted to show some love to all the 40k+ wordcount fics that have been updated this year! All of these works must have taken hours of thought, dedication, writing and editing. Some authors started writing these years ago, others started just this year and have already accomplished so much!

The community we riddlebird enjoyers have cultivated both here and on ao3 has always been dear to me, so I also want to thank the people who have commented and left kudos on these fics. These fics are shared for your enjoyment, your curiosity, and you spamming unintelligible nonsense in that comment section. Thank you for doing your part 🫡

Here is the long, wonderful list:

(Always read the tags! Also, if I missed you, feel free to reblog with a link to your work, I promise I tried my best. And if you have a fic from this year that was less than 40k but you're super proud of it, please share a link! You deserve love too! I would link every single fic from this year if I could but then this would be ao3 page simulator so... yeah)

Bonded by corgiblud, liverliquid

A permanent bond. Edward glanced at Oswald. Gaze dropping back down to his own hand after a moment, as he wasn't sure he could bear looking at the other for long. Less out of fear of being hurt, and more out of actually being convinced that this was real.

This work is a creation from the two writers' rp and follows Ed discovering Oswald is a vampire after rescuing him outside his apartment.

Ed-ucation by Inkfowl

Edward has THE Penguin as both his roommate and teacher. He'll be learning from the best killer in Gotham, but Oswald has more than one lesson to impart on his eager student.

This work is a creation from a long-time Riddlebird/Nygmobblepot writer. After The killing of Mr. Leonard in Ed's apartment, it's clear that Oswald has a lot to teach him, and Ed has a lot to learn.

Flightless by ThatGaiaGirl

4 years after the tragic deaths of Thomas and Martha Wayne, two of the most dangerous men in Gotham have a chance encounter that may just change everything.

This work is part of a series that explores "anti-hero" versions of DC charcters. This fic in particular follows Ed and Oswald's journey to become the Penguin and the Riddler.

I Gave You My Heart and I Don't Want it Back by 221blackandwhitestripes

Oswald knows everything. And he loves him. He just doesn't like him.

This work is the third installment of a series set after Oswald wakes up in the hospital with memory loss. This final part follows the aftermath of Oswald regaining his memories and Ed's attempt to regain trust and mend their relationship. This one also happens to be written by me!

I Love You, Oswald Cobblepot by ratshark

After getting sent to Arkham, Ed is set on escaping and breaking Oswald out of Blackgate.

This work explores what may have happened in the ten years Oswald and Ed were separated in Arkham and Blackgate in Gotham TV. Ed joins forces with some familiar friends to try get Oswald out of Blackgate.

In The Good Old Days (When Times Were Bad) by Strewn_Limbs

Edward Nygma (once Edward Atticus Nashton who was born in Huxford, Alabama) had hated most of where he came from. Other than a couple nice cousins, there was nothing worthwhile of home to remember or think fondly of in the future that he made for himself. There was no need to dwell on silly things like past trauma when he now chooses the path he walks. Except, there's no real way to escape over a decade of abuse at the hands of his father, but maybe discovering his villain identity and repressing memories while he tangles in the lives of more evil beings will help as a distraction. Couldn't hurt, right?

This work is 50 chapters long! Each chapter is a short story that delves into Ed's life and his relationship with "The Riddler". This author has been writing for Riddlebird/Nygmobblepot since 2018!

The King Of Gotham by Esperata

The City of Gotham has been decimated by an earthquake and is days away from being cut off from the United States. The Penguin must make plans and ready himself to not only survive, but thrive through the year to come.

This work is written by an author with more than 150 Riddlebird fics under their belt! They have spent hours and years writing about this pairing, and has been an active participant in the community on ao3, tumblr, and elsewhere! This particular fic is inspried by the comic book arc: No Man's Land and follows Ed and Oswald trying to make the best out of a bad situation.

The Liberation Of Edward Nygma by marilyn4ever

Set during season one. Oswald holds Ed hostage in an attempt to get Jim Gordon off his back so he can run Gotham however he sees fit. Unfortunately for Oswald, no one at the GCPD wants Edward Nygma back. What does he do with the head of forensics now?. Having held the man captive for weeks, the two men have become quite close. Will Oswald let Ed go free?, or kill him?, now that he is of no further use to him. Edward has plans of his own.

Written by a longtime Riddlebird/Nygmobblepot author, this fic follows the unlikely relationship between a kinapper (Oswald) and his victim (Ed).

Martín and the Other World by whats_those

"Martín?" Martín turned back to see Oswald standing beside the chair, facing him. He was dressed down to his shirtsleeves with his vest unbuttoned, more casual than Martín was used to seeing him, but that was not what made him take a step back in shock. Oswald wasn't wearing an eye patch, and both of his eyes were big, black buttons. "I thought I heard you sneaking around." ~ One rainy day, Martín finds a strange little door in the drawing room of the Van Dahl mansion.

This work combines Gotham and Coraline together, with Martín as Coraline! You may have seen people talking about this fic on here before, so remember to give their posts about it some love!

Our Time Is Now by water_and_jellyfish

Having found each other, Oswald and Edward managed to sort out many misunderstanding between them that had piled up in their past life and decided to make a brave move and give their feelings for each other a chance for once. Now, in their early twenties, they are trying to take even braver step forward and reclaim their rightful place in Gotham society. Riddler and Penguin might've died over twenty years ago, but they are ready to make a comeback. The question is: is Gotham ready for them?

This work is a sequel to Once and Future, a fic that covers reincarnation as Oswald is born again. This sequel explores what happens when he and Ed grow to become real criminals in Gotham City.

The Penguin and The Peacock by Match_less

When he was a child living on The Falcone estate, Oswald saw a peacock. He thought it’s beautiful in the way strange things are, even if it bit him and made his hand bleed. Many years later, while plotting for the fall of Don Falcone, Oswald met a man who’s beautiful in the way strange things are, even if he kissed him and made his heart bleed.

This work features vivid imagery and explores both Ed and Oswald's psyche, their idea of love, and their relationship to each other. You may have seen the terrific art the author has posted for the fic here on tumblr. Remember to give it some love!

Phoenix Feather by BlueDancer9000

Oswald finds a child in "Everyone Has A Cobblepot," and it goes from there. There will be crying, Oswald simping over Edward, and more Victor Zsasz content because I loved his dynamic with Oswald.

This Author's first fic posted on ao3, it is all about found family and exploring multiple different familial relationships. A lot of sweetness and Dadwald!

Skin Hunger by slingbees

Only days after Oswald's miraculous return to the living world and a lukewarm public reception, Gotham loses track of its recently reinstated mayor once more. Without any witnesses, and with no reason to believe any attempts to locate him will be successful, Oswald is left to collaborate in the Pyg's magnum opus or face inhumane consequences.

This work has Oswald kidnapped by a familiar face after his return to Gotham. Jim and Ed will do their best to track him down. Also: Cannabilism! You may have seen Slingbees around here so remember to give them some love!

Strange Bedfellows by Philosopher_King

Jim and Oswald agree that the relationship between Edward Nygma and Lee Thompkins is a disaster waiting to happen, so they come up with a desperate plan: plant evidence that they're having a secret affair to spark jealousy in Ed and Lee and draw them away from each other. Their plan is both complicated and helped along by simultaneous crises involving the brothers Valeska…

This work has Jim and Oswald fake a relationship to make Lee and Ed jealous. To say that things get complicated would be an understatement. Inspired by this tumblr post! You may have seen the author posting on tumblr before so remember to give them some love!

time is a grenade (and you’re holding it the wrong way) by jupitersglow

Ed learns a lesson, but it takes a few tries.

This work has major time-loop shenanigans to make your headspin as you watch Ed make a fool of himself to fix his situation. You may have seen the author posting about the physics research they did while writing this! Major props to them!

When The Stars Turn Red by PsychosMarket

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙪𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙨 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙝, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩'𝙨 𝙨𝙤 𝙗𝙡𝙪𝙚 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙜𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙞𝙡 𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝘽𝙮 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙥𝙞𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚; "𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪" ---------- Edward Nygma is a nerdy, shy man who works in forensics at the local police station. A man who lived two lives, it seemed. He hadn't meant to, really. It was a sort of accident. But seeing as how he’s the notorious murderer that everyone seems to be talking about or looking for, it was hard to avoid that. It was at work when he saw him, a slight glance vaguely upward, wondering distantly about how to win the game he had waiting for him at home, and presently wondering who was yelling so loudly at a police officer. Then he saw him. A man who made his heart stop and the voice in his head stop its endless yammering. And he needed to know who this man was. The man, however, didn't seem to care. This man, was Oswald Cobblepot.

This work has strong imagery and explores Ed's obsessive tendencies, trauma, and internal conflict. 94 chapters, 488k words and counting, this fic is a tremendous feat!

you give yourself to him by enigmamorte

Edward tries to steal a mobster’s car and becomes his sugar baby. Somehow.

This work accidentally did The Penguin (HBO) before it even aired! Like the characters in its source material, the depictions of Ed and Oswald are a little rougher and more grounded and gritty. You may have seen the author hanging around on tumblr, talking about the show, and sharing their thoughts. Send them some love!

AND THAT'S IT, FOLKS!

Again, if I missed you, please reblog with a link! And if you've read any of the above fics, feel free to put them in the tags and tell everyone what you liked! Thanks everyone for an amazing riddlebirdweek and amazing year!!!

#riddlebirdweek #riddlebird #nygmobblepot #fanfiction #fanfic #gotham #the penguin #batman 2022 #dc comics #dc universe #edward nygma #oswald cobblepot #the riddler #fic list

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lisholoz · 7 months ago

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How do you deal with people bringing up that Slade is a pedo in the comics. I'm sure SOMEONE has tried to bring it up to you before. I like Slade myself but I hear this a lot and it just makes me feel conflicted ya know? Cause I honestly don't care about what happens in fiction cause that's all it is but when someone constantly brings it up it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong when I'm justnlikeing an old man character with white hair, tendency to kill, etc etc. I don't think I'm strong enough to deal with backlash if I drew him and getting those comments so I just wanna know how do you deal with them if you do

I just treat it the same as other comics . There's plenty of other comics or media where I'm like yikes I don't like what they did there so I just pick and choose the content I do like. You gotta remember that original comic is from 40 years ago. Some content retcons it, some content like Priest's Deathstroke acknowledges it as wrong. The best advice I can give you is to not take EVERY single comic into account when liking a character. Even for me I only got super into Deathstroke from Arkham Origins and Arkham Knight so my perspective of Slade is gonna be much different from someone who got into him from the teen titans OG comics . Heck my first introduction to Slade was through Teen Titans cartoon and I don't even think of that Slade and the Slade from something like Deathstroke Inc as the same person. If it makes you feel better I haven't gotten any hate about my Slade art (this does NOT apply to tiktok lmfao the comments on any Slade content are wild). I think it'd be a shame to write off a character for one thing in a comic when there's so many other comics you can choose to enjoy. Try not to get bogged down by what other people think! At the end of the day you can block them, and surround yourself with fellow villain enjoyers that understand comics aren't real life lol.

Edit: also I feel like I should mention he's not real. Liking any content/character =/= condoning the actions. There's lots of content out there that isn't to my tastes but I live and let live. At the end of the day fandom is meant to be fun and trying to police other people's experience is always a bad idea.

LEGO DC supervillains Deathstroke solos any other representation of him anyways 😝

#ask me anything

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kgthesillyclown · 6 months ago

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what do u think of the Affogato cookie ✨

For me the affogato is one of the most successful cookies, he has a wonderful design and I love every single detail they gave him, I especially love how they wrote him, he is a manipulator who managed to gain the trust of the DC and then have the control of the kingdom, a bit like Smoked Cheese when I think about it now. This character really has potential but I don't know why devsis don't use him. Of all the cookie villains, it's the best along with Smoked Cheese & he have the best design of all for me

#cookie run kingdom #crk #Cookie run #Affogato cookie

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celaenaeiln · 1 year ago

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Hi! I really love all your takes and character analysis. I'm new-ish to Batman so these are always so educational for me 😅 I was wondering, in your opinion, of all the batkids, who would you say would make the most terrifying villains? And who, canonically, would you say exercises the most self control to prevent exactly that from happening? Like every day, they have to work to prevent themselves from crossing that line.

...(Is it Dick? I feel like you're going to say Dick)

Thank you!

You got me!! Those are good questions!

I had to think a lot about this honestly.

So for most terrifying villain, I would say Dick. Mostly because it's just canon. When Dick was the villain both times in New Order and in DC vs Vampires, he practically eradicated the world based on who he felt needed to go. In DC vs Vampires he didn't care for anyone so by the time he was done there were no humans left. In New Order he lost it when the heroes accidentally killed Bruce and thus destroyed the entire justice league and remade himself as the head of all military operations under the government. Dick also knows exactly how to kill Bruce and he's terrified of it (Nightwing: Knight Terrors). Kory once told him during the Teen Titans (2003?) comic that Dick could stack up all the Titans and could take on the Justice League if he wanted to but Dick states that he knows and that's exactly why he's scared.

Also the way he manipulates every single person in existence in both his typical Nightwing runs is just a hint of the brilliance. Many times when his partners want to chase after a villain, he makes them let them go so that he grab the lizard, its hiding spot, and its family rather than just the tail.

Grayson Annual #3

Dick is not reckless in anyway either, he plans and analyzes and calculates as he moves which makes him a fantastic strategist, detective, and doer all in one.

Or actually I change my mind, I choose Cass. I forgot about her initially. Cass can beat everyone in the world (except Harley). Batman has admitted it too.

Detective Comics (2016) Issue #951

She's unstoppable. So unless the Batfamily sends in Harley, in a straight fight where no one runs away *cough* Batman Issue 137 *cough*, then Cass would win. After her though, in a tactical and fighting sense combined it would be Dick.

Jason is canonically the one who struggles with self-control everyday. But unlike some people, I don't think this a fault of his that should be changed or erased. To me, each robin represents a certain characteristic of society.

Dick - the hope of the people.

Jason - the anger of the people.

Tim - the morality of the people.

Stephanie - the safety of the people.

Damian - the rights of the people.

Dick says the meaning of robin is helping the good. And all the robins do this in their own ways.

Jason's robin represents the rightful anger by the people against the injustice. Like the Boston Tea Party against Britain's taxation, Jason was born and raised in Gotham so his love for the common people on the street is overwhelming. He wants to help every woman and child find a better life and survive because it's reflective of the life he and his mother were forced to face. So when he sees a man sexually assaulting a woman or beating a child or selling drugs, his anger bursts out. And in Gotham, there's a lot of that everywhere. So take a good person and put in him the skills and fuel for hurting the bad and you get Jason Todd. That's why from his Robin days he has struggled with self-control.

"He was a drug dealing pimp."

Batman (1940) Issue #645

"I'm sorry...but that doesn't mean he didn't deserve it."

Furthermore in the Batman Urban Legends comic also in the Batman and Robin Eternal comic it shows that Jason's greatest wish is the Joker's death and that coupled with the Gotham War and Selina's interference, Jason has the most trouble with self-control. But I believe it's rightfully so.

I think after Jason it's Dick who struggles with self-control. Not as robin but as Nightwing. Especially during his darkest days of the Nightwing (1996) comic and the Outsiders comic, Dick has been shown to forcibly stop himself when someone hurts his friends or family.

Okay, the difference between Jason and Dick's struggle with self-control is that Jason feels it all the time because his motivating factor is ever present while Dick only struggles with it when someone hurts the people he loves because that's Dick's motivating factor.

Damian is the one who has the most trouble after that. Then Stephanie, Tim, Cass, and Duke. Although if you're including Stephanie's robin days, she would be tied with Jason.

#dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #robin jason todd #bruce wayne #batman #cassandra cain #orphan #cl anon asks #thanks for the ask!#cl asks

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zeroducks-2 · 2 years ago

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tell us about the nasty Slade man from TT03

since you guys (and @exhausted-pigeon) asked, here's me talking about iconic Teen Titans 2003 Slade :D

Disclaimer right here. Unlike a lot of fortunate folks, I did not have Teen Titans available to watch back then (I really missed out, especially cause I was in my pre-teen years and that would have been The Perfect Show for me at that point). This means that I only got to watch tt03 recently, therefore these thoughts don't come from someone who holds the show dear as a childhood memory, and who fell in love with it a long time ago, who had their christening to DC stuff through that and yada yada.

I'll therefore discuss tt03 Slade without personal/emotional involvement, and keeping in mind that tt03 is indeed a show intended for a young audience. I'll be adding screenshots for poignancy, so it's going to be a pretty long post :)

End of disclaimer, now onto the good shit.

So, what to say about Slade. Fans have been calling him downright devious, the Teenagers Tormentor, A True Menace To Society, a master manipulator, and a child predator even if there's nothing *too* explicit being that this is a show for kids.

(not that kids being the target audience stopped them showing Slade sleeping with Tara in NTT back in the '80s, but that's a conversation for another time)

Do I think that any of this is true? The answer is essentially yes, I agree with all of the above.

Slade is a very fun character, and his presence dominates the scene every time he's on screen. He's a solid villain, one that feels truly threatening for the protagonists (and not like a forgettable bad guy who can be overpowered with The Power Of Friendship™), and he fits perfectly with the dynamic of the show. He will do the most ridiculous corny things, like materializing at random in a corner of a panoramic wheel cart, while the wheel is in motion, right when Terra and Beast Boy are about to kiss (just to ruin their night basically).

I tried to find a gif cause this scene is too funny but sadly I didn't manage.

But he will also (and mostly) do fucked up shit which people nowadays argue as not belonging in a kid show, like grooming teenagers and/or forcing them to work for him.

His design is also easily iconic, and he's huge in bulk compared to the tiny, slender kid protagonists, adding to the threatening vibe.

I mean look at that Raven's a mushroom compared to him

But he's not a monster - you know he's a human being while you're watching the show, whether you imagine an eyepatch and silver hair like comicbooks!Slade or you picture a completely different kind of face on him, you still know he's just a man... or is he.

The show subtly toys with the idea that Slade might not be human after all. His face is never shown - every single time one of the characters manages to overpower him and unmask him, they find out that they've been fighting against a robot.

This happens after a fight so violent Robin almost dies by falling off a building, and SLADE HIMSELF saves him - reason being more or less "I'm not done kicking your ass". Eventually Robin manages to overpower him, takes off his mask, and lo and behold:

Slade wasn't even there the whole time.

Also, he seems to live in some sort of lab filled with complicated tech and huge gears that spin into nothing. Does this man even need to sleep, eat or drink?

What is this place and how high is the rent

I love what he did with the huge gears it's so ambient

All of this contributes to the threatening, mysterious aura surrounding the character. Which at times can turn into outright terrifying despite the show being relatively lighthearted. Pretty soon the narrative manages to establish the fact that Slade is nearly impossible to beat, that he will do anything to bring down the protagonists (or bring them under his control), and that you can always expect the worst from him.

But the most interesting aspect to discuss is for most people the child predator vibes this character has from his first appearance throughout the entirety of the show. And to whoever says "you can't tell me that they didn't do this intentionally", well, consider two things

1 - Slade in the comicbooks did sleep with a 15yo, in order to use her to bring down the Titans. So like, the fact that he *might* sleep with kids isn't much of a far-fetched hypothesis and 2 - The way he acts goes beyond the average "well this is a kids show of course the villain will act in weird ways towards kids".

Let me expand a little on this second point. When the protagonist of a story is a kid, the villain that will try to hurt/kill them is not automatically a child predator or a child abuser, only because he hurts a kid. In the context of that story it makes sense that the villain will act as if the protag was an adult - the story was created with a young audience in mind, and if other characters treated the protag like a child it would break their immersion.

So is this the case with Slade? Well yes, but actually no. There obviously is a case of "he treats the characters like adults cause it's a kids show" but does he, really? Slade works with the fact that the characters are kids, therefore inexperienced and easy to manipulate. He also wants an apprentice, which necessarily has to be young. In Terra's case, he plays on her insecurities and her need for someone to teach her and guide her. And then there's the way the scenes are directed and the creepiness factor of just how this man interacts with these kids that rightfully puts him in the creep zone, regardless of what exactly the story will show in terms of explicit details.

For this to make more sense I need to make examples, so let's dive in a little deeper starting with Fans Favorite's ... *drumroll* ...

The Apprentice Arc

It starts out with Slade contacting the Titans to tell them that he planted a bomb in the city. Robin, who's already obsessing at the point of waking up drenched in sweat after nightmares where he and Slade beat the shit out of each other, snaps into action to retrieve the trigger of the bomb.

Tis Robin waking up in his "Pepe Silvia" room dedicated to Slade after a nightmare, for your viewing pleasure.

So off the kids go, and while Robin chases Slade, the rest of the team goes try and dismantle the bomb. Slade tosses Robin around for a while, and when Robin manages to grab the remote control, Slade reveals that this is not a remote control because there is no bomb at all - rather, the rest of the Titans have just gotten hit with a laser beam that infected them with nanomachines. Now Robin has to do Slade's bidding and become his apprentice; if he refuses, or disobeys, Slade will use a button to inflict pain and potentially kill the other Titans, thanks to those nanomachines.

These are said nanomachines attached to the Titans' blood cells, conveniently displayed in huge ass screens. I love this scene so much it's so SERIOUS and SO CORNY at the same time lmao.

What ensues is Robin being forced to become Slade's apprentice, dressed in a cute replica of Slade's own suit,

And meanwhile Slade tosses him around either for the funsies or because Robin dares do something he doesn't like. Explicitly saying that he wants Robin to call him "Master". Please go watch the scene, it's 7 seconds long but it conveys EVERYTHING. This mf calls Robin "good boy" in the most condescending way you can ever imagine. Here, click this, I promise you won't be disappointed.

Here's Slade beating up a child for your viewing pleasure.

So at some point Robin is ordered to infiltrate Wayne Enterprise. The Titans try to stop him, Slade pushes for him to fight them, but baby doesn't want to especially when Starfire refuses to engage him. Slade not only starts to torture them with the nanomachines, forcing Robin to shoot them, but when kiddo gets back to him he receives the ass-whooping of his life, followed by this scene:

Here Slade is basically saying "I'm going to put you in your place in a way that will stick", but the scene is conveniently cut by the arrival of the rest of the Titans.

Robin has the idea of infecting himself with the nanomachines, so now if Slade wants to kill them, he has to kill him too. And Slade... tosses away the button, discarding the nanomachines plan on the spot, because the point REALLY was having Robin as an apprentice. If he can't have him, then there's no point.

Then there's Terra's Arc in Season 2, which goes more or less like this:

The Titans meet Terra, a kid their age who's very strong (she can manipulate the earth) but can't perfectly control her own powers. She's very self-conscious about this and when Beast Boy finds out, she begs him not to tell anyone, which he promises.

Soon after she gets singled out by Slade, who corners her and starts poking and prodding about how weak she is, unable to control her powers, and how her "new friends" will soon find out and once they do, they will discard her.

Honestly the fact that he's so big and Terra's itty bitty teeny tiny really adds to the overall creepiness of this scene. They're blocked in a cave underground btw, and to hammer the point home Slade starts tossing her around until she completely freaks out and almost buries herself under the rubble.

Soon after that, Robin deduces by himself that Terra isn't in complete control of her powers, but Terra thinks that Beast Boy snitched on her after promising he wouldn't say anything. Hurt and betrayed she runs away, and guess who she runs to?

As far as I remember, the amount of time Terra spends with Slade is nondescript. But what she says is that he trained her, taught her to not be afraid of her own powers (which is true, she can control her powers now), and gave her a purpose and direction. She comes back and infiltrates the Titans, now being a well groomed little spy, but despite her efforts Slade keeps being abusive and beats the living hell out of her when she comes back to him after a failed mission. He can puppeteer her through the suit she's wearing, but at some point she manages to break free of his control and the arc ends tragically with Terra killing Slade, and herself.

Is this the end of it then? Nuh-huh. Here comes the

Whatever the fuck is happening to Robin Arc

So Slade is dead. But at some point during a fight, Robin starts seeing him and chasing him, getting a mild ass-whoop like he normally would. His teammates are obviously confused but they comply when Robin tells them to go defuse these bombs that Slade planted - only there are no bombs. And it looks like Robin is the only one who can even see Slade.

The situation escalates at the point of Robin having to be strapped to a bed because he was literally killing himself while "fighting Slade", despite being the only one who could see him. Slade himself is the one that frees him from the restraints, and keeps beating him within an inch of his life, at the point that Robin starts begging.

And here we have what's probably the most memorable line of the whole show: "I am the thing that keeps you up at night. I am the evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest and neither will you."

What is happening here in theory is that Robin got dosed with toxic dust coming from Slade's mask, therefore he's seeing things and his brain is in so much stress that he might die from strain (he ends up saving himself by turning on the light). But taking into consideration what happened during the Apprentice arc, it's easy to see parallels with PTSD.

There is actually more. There's Slade being resurrected by Trigon and going rapey on Raven (you've seen the screenshot before) by tearing off her cape, and there's also an epic moment in which Slade goes to hell, WITH ROBIN'S HELP, to retrieve his own body and aid in the fight against Trigon. But I think my point already came across well enough:

Teen Titans 2003 Slade is a fucking creep, and compared to him, NTT Deathstroke is a sweet little lamb who wouldn't hurt a fly. Which is why it is so funny to me when people claim tt03 Slade is "better cause he never slept with a teenager" - Boy oh boy, you might have not seen it on screen but the subtext is clear as day.

This man has no moral code, no bounds (other than what the PG rating of the show will place on him) and not an ounce of humanity. I don't need to see no scene with half naked kids smoking cigarettes with only a bathrobe as clothing (like this one) to know what this man did.

#long post #Slade #teen titans 2003 #my asks #thank you for asking folks it was my pleasure to talk about this horrible horrible man #they don't make villains like these anymore #and to be honest they never did before #Slade is one of a kind

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